The Journal of Lady Mia Pussington: I Have Arrived!

I arrived at my new home via Amazon 1 Day Delivery. Just kidding, this is a recent photo - I LOVE boxes

​I arrived just over a year ago. Back then I was the very definition of a Scaredy Cat, so timid I wouldn’t say meow to a toy duck. In fact, I spent the first month at my new home hidden behind a cupboard. It used to take the hoo-mons a good 15 – 30 minutes to coax me out for some food. I didn’t know them then, I preferred to skulk out at night and eat while everyone was in bed. They got me a brand new basket to sleep in, but I was having none of it – nothing could be better than the security of being uncomfortably stuffed into a narrow space, where casually passing predators would be unlikely to see me.
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I can still remember the first time the male one spent nearly an hour awkwardly sat on the floor coaxing me out of my hidey-hole, his voice becoming ever so softer with each inch I slowly got closer until I was adorably rolling around on the floor as he tickled me and fed me treats. Apparently his back was aching for a whole week after that, but I over-heard him say it was worth it. I felt sorry for him, but I couldn’t help but continue my shy little routine every night, it’s just the coy lil’ cutsie I am. 
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​Then, one day, a great big tower appeared. Although cautious of it at first, I quickly made it my new abode – I’m in the penthouse now darling, six levels of joy! Moving into my own little mansion changed me, it showed me the diva I was always born to be. Not long after, I slowly came to realise that the hoo-mons were actually my servants – and to think, I had been treating them as equals! How embarrassing.

I have since programmed them relatively well, making them firmly aware of when I need stroking and tickling, however getting them to dish out the tuna on command still seems to need more work. Although they have finally learned I want it every day, no matter how much I shout at them I still can’t seem to make them get it for me whenever I want. Stupid hoo-mons, maybe they only know how to use a tin opener after 5 o’clock? If I could, I would definitely get them replaced, but not before having them whipped and shredded into a thousand slices of Idiot steaks. Ahhh no, I’m just kidding.

Mostly.
 
Until next time worshippers.
Love, 
Mia x